Chapter III: The Blessing
Vihaan
How will you feel if you meet
someone with whom you can speak everything that has happened in your life till
date? How will you feel if you can meet someone with whom you do not even
require time to open up? How will you feel if you can meet someone who
instantly gives you a sense of déjà vu? I had the same feeling meeting Ahana
that day.
From once a very talkative
Vihaan in my childhood, I had transformed to become a good listener instead. I don't know why but I stopped
sharing much with people leaving most of the things to myself. But in the
journey I made a lot of friends because they always found me to be the reliable
one with whom they can share everything, the one with whom they need not worry
about being judged or get conscious and the one with whom they can find
solutions to their emotional problems. That’s how my inclination towards
psychology and personal counselling grew. But there was a vacuum that was
created in my Life that nobody had filled. There were not many people with whom
I would share every detail of my Life, literally none. Most of the times, my
thoughts and emotions would find solace within me.
I don’t know why that night I
got a random thought to search Ahana’s name on Facebook search panel. I think
that was the best thing I did in recent times. Ahana Garadi, Ahana Ruth Pinto,
Ahana Choudhury, Ahana Prabhakar and finally there was Ahana Deekshith which
caught my attention. When it was Ahana, my happiness knew no bounds. My best
moment of Life had a new replacement. We both chatted for 6 hours straight that
night and we instantly connected with each other. After that day, there was no
looking back and our chats never stopped. During the course I only realized
that this was something beyond what I had always envisaged. She is definitely
not someone who should just be a chapter of my life. She is the one who should
be in every chapter of my Life.
When you are so well connected
to a person and you know that the feeling is mutual, there will be no fear.
Your mind will only know peace. Our feelings were so pure and the relationship
built was so crystal clear that there was no fear of rejection or fear of being
friend zoned. We were in a relationship and to be frank there was nothing like
a proposal that happened between us. I still remember that day. I had met with
a small accident. Ahana was calling me once every hour to check if everything
was fine. She was constantly asking me, “Could you not be a bit careful? Could
you not see the red signal instead of going ahead and meeting with the
accident? I don't know why you still have not seen a doctor” and I immediately
told her, “I don’t know if I could have seen all those but I definitely see a
lot of love in your words.” She just smiled and that spoke everything. It was
so natural that there was no need for one person to break the ice and give it a
different name and a new beginning. No
kneeling down, no roses, no chocolates, no gifts and no ring exchange and yet
it was very special.
We completed two years of our
relationship last December and I don’t know how time flew. If I am a blessed
man then she is my blessing. There was one incident which still astonishes
both of us till date. One night I suddenly woke up from my sleep at 2.30 AM or so
with a very bad feeling and lot of unrest in mind. I did not know what was
causing so much of unrest in me. It was as if something was pulling me from my
sleep. I switched on lights and then checked my Whatsapp for any messages from
her. To my surprise, she was online and her status suddenly changed to ‘typing’
and again to ‘online’. Still there was no text from her. When I realized, she
wanted to share something but is apprehensive that she would disturb my sleep
and is erasing the same, I texted her and she called me back.
Ahana had a cyst in her
stomach which was not life threatening but which used to cause her unbearable pain
almost once every week. It was something that would dissolve automatically. She
called me and asked, “Hey how do you know that I needed you the most during
this time?” and I told her, “When I told you I will be with you when you needed
me the most, I just din’t tell it. I meant it.” I would be thinking this is
what actually caused the unrest and woke me up. This had happened many a times
with both of us. I used to feel so helpless that I am not able to do anything
when she was suffering from so much pain. I used to try diverting her mind by
telling random stuff. But even by doing it I have cried silently so many times
that I am not with her at that moment to take care of her. But these incidents
have always astonished both of us thinking about the depth of our connection.
As we were in different
cities, meeting each other was definitely not regular. But long distance
relationship never became a hindrance as we were so connected that the distance
of 1490 Kms between Bangalore and Ahmedabad never mattered. We made it a point
to meet up on every anniversary and each other’s birthday. I used to take a
morning flight to Ahmedabad and meet her in the airport. We used to spend the
whole day together. We used to go to a restaurant, a mall, a local eating
joint, a fair and I would take the evening flight back to Bangalore. She used
to accompany me till the airport in the cab so that we don’t miss even a small
opportunity of being together.
My day would get complete only
when I finally tell her about my day. She was one person who would bring out
whatever was inside me. I used to listen to people’s problems all day and
sometimes I used to get very disturbed. Sometimes I had no solution to many
problems. I used to discuss a few problems with Ahana and many a times she had
come out with solutions so simple that I had never thought of. It was as if we
are always together even though we weren’t. It was obviously she who was the
one with whom I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. We had small dreams,
high ambitions and an expectation of a very good life together.
When we discussed about our
marriage with our parents, initially there was a sense of disbelief and
apprehension in them. Both the families met in my house in Bangalore and
discussed. After two to three rounds of discussion to convince them on how sure
we both were about this relationship, they agreed. They were fully not
convinced because we belonged to different castes, had different cultures and were
from different communities. But we were sure we will live in such a way that
they eventually do not regret their decision of getting us married. The wedding
date got fixed and it was in Bangalore.
During the process of
marriage, the families got closer. The marriage preparations were happening in
full swing. Ahana had just a few of her friends to invite but I had a lot of
friends to be personally invited. We both had taken a month off for the
wedding. We ensured that for all our close friends, we both personally meet and
invite them for our wedding. It was enjoyable as for the first time we had got
time to travel different places to invite all those dear ones. As the days
neared, there was less anxiety and more peace. It was very different from what
everyone had told me about the wedding day. There was no fear, less anxiety and
very less uncertainty in mind as there was a lot of peace and happiness that
had settled in. Even Ahana felt it the same way.
It was our wedding day. I
finally felt so delighted looking at the board “Ahana weds Vihaan” coming up.
It was the dream we both saw from the past two years. It was like a fairy tale
ending to our story. As the near and dear ones came to the reception, there was
so much happiness all around. There was classical music in the background to
soothe everyone’s heart. Sister Jessica who had come up to greet told us, “I
have seen you guys from school. Maybe you were destined to be together. Really
very happy for you. Jesus, bless these children” and we took her blessings. It
was the day when we got to meet a lot of friends, colleagues and family members
together. Though tiring, we had to save all our energy for the big day coming
up the next day.
The wedding ceremony was as
per traditional Iyer customs as per Ahana’s family wishes. It had more rituals
than what we had. I had already spent more than an hour chanting shlokas and
performing rituals that the priest was directing me to. Finally I saw Ahana
entering the mantap in her wedding attire. She was looking gorgeous in her
saree that I could not take my eyes off her. There were so many things running
in my mind that moment. I felt like we had come a long way before making this
happen. I felt she is my girl and my better half from now on. I felt I now have
a wonderful responsibility of taking really good care of her. I felt so
satisfied and grateful about my life that moment.
As she sat on her father’s lap
and it was time for the mangalsutra, I could see tears in her eyes. I so badly
wanted to hug her that moment but I couldn’t. Finally I put the mangalsutra around
her neck with the nadaswaram being played in the background. At the same time I
tied another turmeric thread around her neck and at that moment we both looked
at each other and just smiled. That smile had thousands of words. I can never
forget that smile on her face. It was such a priceless moment. We walked the
seven steps around the sacred fire in order to begin our journey of innumerable
steps, countless memories and an unknown path.
When every thing was over by evening and we both just sat on the scattered chairs I asked Ahana something that had probably given her the shock of her life and left her shivering. I asked her, “What if I now tell you that I am not the Vihaan whom you were searching for all those years?”
-Naveen S N
*Chapter IV dates announcing soon*
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